Administrative Assistant's Update

JANUARY 2018 4 "You are often supporting individu- als who are experiencing a variety of emotions at a particular time and who might be facing a deadline or pressure for delivery before council," she says. "Or someone is about to get ready for a staff meeting and doesn't feel prepared. So you are dealing with peo- ple's anxieties, frustration, annoyance, anger, excitement and enthusiasm. "In the role itself, admin professionals can feel pressured or overwhelmed or anxious." Often emotions are seen as "bad" feelings that need to suppressed, but Holloway says they can be harnessed to good effect. An important starting point, she says, is for individuals to recognize how they typically react in stressful situations. "It means knowing your typical triggers and reactions to par - ticular kinds of events, challenges or people." Schill recalls a recent incident when she was about to leave the office for an out-of-town appointment and a manager from another department called on her to urgently deal with a time-sensitive council agenda item. For some, the unexpected demand could have sparked a testy exchange. But Schill chose a different strategy: she apologized that she could not fill the request, asked for clarifying information on what was needed and when and identified a colleague who could fill the request. "I do think it is about being able to take a calm approach," says Schill. "You have to be able to squelch those [negative] emotions in the moment and allow yourself more time to con - sider them before you react." Self-awareness takes practice, concedes Holloway, who encourages admins to role-play with colleagues or friends. "Don't go out the door and practice your new-found emotional intelli- gence with your nemesis because you are going to get eaten alive," she ad- vises. "You have to choose a support group of folks around you to begin to practice this." Beyond self-awareness, regulating emotions is a complementary feature of emotional intelligence to ensure one's fears and anxieties don't rule the moment, says Holloway. "If you open your mouth when your emotional brain is in charge you are going to make the best speech you will ever regret," she says. In Vernon, Biluk has witnessed how self-awareness and self-regula - tion are tools for defusing potentially difficult situations. As an assistant to the city's real estate manager, she has watched the rollout of a new city policy to develop public access lands to Lake Okanagan. Over the years, some privately held properties have encroached on public lands at the lake, creating the potential for friction as the city reclaims its public prop- erty. "We want to have a little empathy for these folks [property owners] and deal with them in a calm manner," says Biluk. "It takes a lot of discus- sion, cooperation and patience." Holloway urges patience and practice in developing emotional intel- ligence. "None of this is easy and it certain- ly isn't going to happen overnight but it is learnable," she says. "If you can practice some of the skills over time then things will improve." Harnessing emotions Continued from page 1 Test your EQ By Staff Not sure if you are emotionally intelligent? Want to manage your emo- tions to good effect? Here are some markers identified by Stacey Holloway, principal of the Holloway Group and a trainer in leadership development and conflict management: Signs of low emotional intelligence: • aggressive, demanding behaviour • egotistical attitude • bossy and confrontational • easily distracted • poor listener • impulsive • resistant to change • passive and unresponsive • stubborn Signs of high emotional intelligence: • assertive and ambitious • strong-willed and decisive • warm and enthusiastic • charming • persuasive • sociable • patient • good listener • predictable and consistent Stacey Holloway

• Cover